Why Prayer Might Be More About Emotional Solace Than Divine Communication

Embracing Uncomfortable Truths with Owen Hawthorn

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Is Prayer Really a Conversation with the Divine, or Just Emotional Comfort?

You know, I’ve been thinking a lot about prayer lately—not from a religious angle, but more like a curious skeptic trying to understand what’s really going on when people pray. We often hear that prayer is about talking to a higher power, getting guidance, or even influencing outcomes through divine communication. But what if that’s only part of the picture? What if prayer’s main function is actually something a bit more... human?

And by human, I mean emotional. What if prayer is primarily a way to soothe ourselves? Like a psychological tool, not a spiritual hotline.

Look, I get it. Prayer has been a central practice in many cultures for thousands of years. It’s comforting, it connects people, and it often helps folks feel less alone during tough times. But when I think about it with fresh eyes, challenging the status quo of this spiritual assumption, I start to see prayer as more of an emotional coping mechanism.

Imagine this: someone’s going through a crisis—maybe dealing with illness, loss, or uncertainty. They pray, and what happens? They might feel calmer, more centered, a bit more hopeful. Their stress decreases. Their anxiety lessens. Is it divine intervention, or simply the effect of expressing worries, hopes, and fears out loud? Kind of like journaling or talking to a trusted friend?

This perspective is uncomfortable for some, I know. It’s one of those uncomfortable truths that shake the foundation of what many consider sacred. But embracing discomfort can be necessary if we want to broaden our understanding and have those important, sometimes offensive topics out in the open.

In fact, psychological studies back this up. The act of vocalizing feelings—whether through prayer, meditation, or even repeated affirmations—can activate parts of our brain that help regulate emotions. It’s like hitting the reset button on our overwhelmed minds. The content of the prayer might not matter as much as the process itself.

Now, I’m not saying prayer doesn’t bring people comfort. Far from it. That kind of solace is valuable and real. It can even improve physical health, if you consider the mind-body connection. But the skeptic in me wants to question the idea that it’s necessarily a two-way conversation with a divine entity. Instead, maybe it’s a way to connect with ourselves—our own needs, hopes, and emotional states—in a structured, culturally accepted way.

This thinking aligns with some of what Bo Bennett, PhD explores in his fascinating book, Uncomfortable Ideas. The book pushes readers to embrace discomfort and question common narratives, including those around faith and spirituality. If you’re interested in understanding different perspectives and challenging that need to always be comfortable, it’s a thought-provoking podcast companion and more.

It makes you realize that having these kinds of uncomfortable conversations and questioning widely held beliefs isn’t an attack on anyone’s faith—it’s part of an honest exploration to better understand why we do the things we do. And whether you’re deeply religious or just casually spiritual, this lens might help you see prayer and its effects in a new way.

So, what’s the takeaway here? Maybe prayer functions less as a mystical line to the heavens and more as a psychological balm. It’s about feeling heard—even if it’s just being honest with ourselves. Challenging the status quo by entertaining this idea doesn’t have to diminish the comfort prayer brings; it just reframes it.

Curious to explore more uncomfortable ideas and see how challenging these kinds of thought patterns can lead to growth? Check out Bo Bennett’s book, Uncomfortable Ideas. It’s an invitation to think differently, question boldly, and embrace discomfort for a richer understanding of the world around you.

Thanks for listening—whether you pray, meditate, or just like reflecting on why we do what we do, I hope this gives you something to ponder next time you find yourself in a quiet moment.

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